Fat

I’m just big boned – Your argument is invalid

Michelangelo 2012 –

So sorry to hear – about your mom’s skydiving accident

Meanwhile – In America

She’s not heavy – She’s Kidnap Resistant

Money – Explains a lot of things

Back boobs – Bigger than most front boobs

Religion – Let’s hope you’re praying for some low-fat meals and fashion tips

Folding your arms – It doesn’t hide the boner

Dedication – I mean, that shit can’t happen over night