Every man – has been in this situation

What happens – when you ask a guy to take your picture

Selfie level – I don’t know a level high enough

So close – he can taste it

I’d eat it – Just sayin’

The awkward moment when you realize – that the sound of nature is the sound of millions of animals, birds and insects desperately trying to get laid

And then you realize – she asked you a question

We lost – by this much

He never told anyone – about his job

My English teacher – stapled a McDonald’s job application to my failed paper